


I met Santa once... It was awful

by apinkducky



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Derek!Santa - Freeform, Frottage, M/M, Robbery, Stiles POV, Stiles!Elf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 16:10:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2818250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apinkducky/pseuds/apinkducky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles is working at the Mall as an Elf. Derek is the grumpy Santa scaring the kids. A robbery will show that neither Stiles nor Derek are who they're supposed to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I met Santa once... It was awful

**Author's Note:**

  * For [badwolfbadwolf](https://archiveofourown.org/users/badwolfbadwolf/gifts).



> Hello there!
> 
> Beta-ed by the [ awesome person here ](chocostains.tumblr.com).  
> All mistakes are mineXD
> 
> Dear [ badwolfbadwolf ](http://badwolfbadwolff.tumblr.com/), I hope you enjoy itXD Merry Christmas!

“Muuum…” The little girl’s lips were trembling as she turned to look at her mother, stretching her little arm towards her “Why is Santa grumpy?”

The woman pulled her daughter from the Santa’s lap, her eyes widening under eyebrows that furrowed in an expression that was borderline rage. “Isn’t Santa good? I only asked him how he was going to get into our house because we don’t have a fireplace.”

“You’re screwed.” Stiles murmured in Derek’s ear. “Again.”

“What is this?” The woman asked indignantly. “I thought you were professionals. Isn’t there a manager around here?”

Stiles took a step closer to the woman, wearing the most childish and charming smile he could muster, that wouldn’t make him look ridiculous in his green tights and red tunic (and the hat; never forget the hat).

“We’re terribly sorry, my lady. It’s just… Santa here is having a bad day.” He wrapped his arms around her shoulders without really touching her, trying to draw her attention away from Derek. “You see, Santa woke up today with a bad case of hemorrhoids. Look at his pitiful face. He can’t even sit straight. Please, excuse his behavior. We can treat you and your adorable daughter to anything you’d like at our Mall’s Starbucks. Go and ask for Erica and tell her the Elf sent you. We’re very sorry again for the inconvenience. If you can come by any other day, I’m sure Santa will be glad to hear and grant your daughter’s wish.”

The woman huffed angrily, clear evidence that she wasn’t going to come again, and freed her shoulders from Stiles’ arms.

“Let’s go, Anna. These people here have no idea how to keep their customers satisfied.” Before she left, she turned, gave a contemptuous look at Derek and covered Anna’s ears. “She’s only four, you—” She huffed furiously, her sentence trailing off. Stiles was impressed she didn’t spat at him. She then turned, cupping her child’s heads with tenderness and headed to Starbucks.

Santa is unprofessional with his customers... _Wow, good job crapping on the magic, Mum!_ Stiles thought amused, as he placed the big protective rope in front of the line where many parents were looking at Derek with a similar look. “Ten minutes break, ladies and gentlemen and wonderful little humans! Santa Claus is tired and needs to pee.” He clapped his hands enthusiastically in a lame attempt to change the atmosphere from sheer shit to almost celebrating.

Sighing he reached Derek who was his usual - that little girl’s phrasing was awesome by the way, because Derek was grumpy as hell today- self. Eyebrows together, lips tightly pressed under the fake white beard, smoke coming out from his ears.

“What the hell Derek? Can’t you just pretend that you enjoy this job? Why would you take it anyway if the only thing you do is scaring the children away?”

Derek breathed through his nose, his eyes everywhere around the room but Stiles. Stiles saw his fists clench and unclench as he was going through something that pretty much looked like exercises for anger management.

“Derek.” Stiles pushed. “Use your words, buddy. It’s not like its on our shoulders a national crisis. They’re children and you’re Santa Claus. Where the hell did that went wrong? Talk to me dude.”

“Okay. Nothing went wrong.”

“This was the second kid since this morning. Are you tired? Do you need a day off? Should we call for Isaac to replace you?” Come on Derek. Stiles was starting to lose his focus here, and his focus wasn’t baby sitting a thirty year old dude with behavioral issues. His focus was behind him, particularly behind the Starbucks’ counter.

“No. I’m fine.”

“Fine? What the—? Do you need a definition for the word fine, dude?”

“Don’t call me, dude.”

“Then tell me what crawled up your ass and died, because like hell I’m going to let you brush off another kid like this. It’s Christmas and no child needs this tradition ruined because of your sorry ass!”

Derek looked away again, his eyes dark but still too green, contrasting with the red and white of his Santa suit all around him, but Stiles didn’t pressure him. This had to be something if Derek wasn’t going to throw anything back at him. He seemed like he was considering the possibility of telling him and that made Stiles’ stomach jump in excitement. A different kind of excitement from the one he had felt earlier this day, while they were putting on their suits in the changing rooms when he was drooling over Derek’s glorious abs, and pecs and biceps and collarbone - certainly collarbone.

Yup. Different.

Excitement.

Kind of.

Where was he?

Talking. Right, he got this. Waiting for Derek to talk.

“Something happened… some years ago. Today’s that date.” He finally said, successfully bringing Stiles back from the wormhole of sexy thoughts he managed to throw himself in in the past astonishing period of three seconds.

The way Derek’s face saddened and his voice got caught in his throat, burned Stiles with the urge to hug him and offer him comfort. It had to be something bad if it was affecting him like this after all this time. Stile moved from one leg to another, considering the best way to deal with this situation, because he had a job to go back to, a job that didn’t just involve gift wishes and elves, when he caught a movement from the corner of his eye that was accompanied by yells. And screams.

Turning his head to check what the commotion was, the gun aimed at the cashier of the closest sportswear store erased all thoughts from his mind and had him dashing into action. He jumped over the protective rope, and turned to the parents and children of the line, some of whom were already scattering. “Go. Go back!” he urged them, head and hands motioning towards the Starbucks at the other side of the Mall.

Ripping his eyes from the people behind him, he finally headed towards the store. The Santa’s placement was perfect; behind the culprit on his seven o’clock. Good. It was a blind point for him, since he’d been checking on his eleven and ten for his exit and Stiles intended to take advantage of it to the fullest.

The man moved his gun like an extension of his hand to urge the cashier give him the money. The "Come on lady” he said, reached Stiles along with his indecision and the fear the man’s voice carried.

Without running, so as not to draw the culprit’s attention, Stiles walked towards him -faster than he’d like, his eyes taking in his surroundings. No one was close to the store’s door, which was constantly open, giving Stiles a full view of the store’s interior. Some people were kneeling on the floor behind stools used for trying shoes, others were hiding behind the shelves, covering themselves as well as possible. Others, more courageous, were contemplating fleeing. Stiles’ guts churned. He wanted this over with. There were children in there.

He was only fifteen feet away from the robber, his rubber soles silent on the marble floor, one hand in front of him as if to stop any sudden movement, when a red mass came from his right side and stood right at the store’s door.

“Merry Christmas, son! I see you have a wish for me?” Fucking Derek. He had his hands up and he was giving the man the fakest smile in all human history.

“Fuck off asshole!”

“Now now, be careful with the language there!” Stiles’ mouth dropped. The asshole hadn’t been so polite with the children for the past two weeks he worked there. And what the fuck was he doing?

Stiles’ blood froze into his veins, his heart beating frantically as the man turned the gun to Derek, forgetting the cashier who was thankfully taking too long. “I said fuck off!”

And there it was. Stiles’s opportunity to stop the man and possibly save Derek’s stupid, impulsive and gorgeous ass. He lashed out at the man, aiming straight for the gun when the red blur beat him to it. Derek disarmed the man with an impressive slap on the man’s wrist, a move that left Stiles with many questions that he shoved at the back of his mind for later, and set his focus on the culprit’s neutralization again. Stiles’ right hand gripped his shoulder, finger pressuring with force at the sensitive tissue, the other hand grabbed the opposite wrist, twisted it and brought it behind his back in a hammerlock. Securing his hold on him, Stiles kicked him behind one of his knees making the man kneel, and let a sigh of relief, wishing for his handcuffs.

“It’s fake.”

“What?”

Derek looked at the gun and pushed it towards Stiles, who realized he was right at first glance.

He gave a short shove and a pat at the man in his hands. “Robbery with a fake gun, dude? Seriously?” he shook his head and looked at Derek. “And what about you, Derek? What’s wrong with you? Falling head first into an armed robbery?”

Derek scoffed. “Me? Same goes for you, Stiles. What kind of normal person would head straight to a man holding a gun?”

“You and me are not the same, dude.”

“And what are you Stiles? Because it’s obvious to me you’re not here just for the Elf part in our show.”

Stiles wanted to reply and tell him that the way he had disarmed the man wasn’t exactly Santa Claus-y but he didn’t have the time as the police arrived, his father among the officers. “Is everyone okay?”

Stiles nodded. “Yeah. Just make the arrest, dad, because I’m too deep in this already.”

Leaving his father to cuff the man and follow the proper procedure for the arrest, Stiles took some steps back, distancing himself from everything as much as he could. In the process, his eyes fell on Derek, who had pulled down his white beard, and was looking at him - well that was a first- with his mouth open, bunny teeth showing sweetly under his upper lip.

Stiles swallowed. The only person who knew about him actually being a cop was Scott, who had day off today. If he wanted to keep appearances to everyone else but Derek, he had to make this look like pure luck.

Derek was a problem though. Even if he wasn’t in his suspect list, having another civilian know his true identity wasn’t reassuring. The fact that he liked that civilian so much he would jizz in his pants every other night thinking about him was completely and absolutely irrelevant.

“Are you okay?”

An echo of the word son lingered at the end of the sentence and Stiles was thankful both for the absence of it and the worry that came up with it. “Yes. I’m okay. Thanks.” He smiled at his father and turned to find Derek who, as far as he knew, was the only loose end in this mess.

Derek, though, was nowhere to be found. In the two minutes Stiles had taken his eyes off of him, he had managed to disappear. Shit.

Stiles gathered from his manager that Derek had left after being informed that they weren’t going to continue the show for the day. Well, now Stiles had one more problem. Apart from the empty day ahead of him, the fact that his investigation was on hold and that he spend the rest of his normally working hours in the mall without excuse, he also had Derek to worry about. Unless he didn’t have to.

Being a cop had its ups and downs. Acquiring information fast, like Derek’s address, was one of the best ups out there. 

* * *

The door opened and Derek’s mouth hanged open for the second time that day.

“Yo.”

“What are you doing here?”

Despite his eyebrows doing the intimidating thingy, Derek wasn’t intimidating at all with his blue jeans and gray Henley. In fact, quite the opposite. He was like sex on legs and Stiles cursed his bad luck that today he had missed their meeting on the dressing room.

“You left.”

“Our shift was over.”

“Don’t you have any questions?”

“I, unlike many people I know, value privacy.”

“Aren’t you going to invite me in?”

“Your secret is safe with me. And no, Stiles. I’m not. You’re free to go.”

Stiles nodded. Apparently, there was nothing here to explain, although the way Derek was trying to send him away seemed a bit off.

“Okay. Well, before I leave, are you… okay?” Derek’s eyebrows expressed his confusion quite ardently. “I mean, today, you weren’t in a good mood. And we’d started talking about the reasons before the robbery interrupted us.”

“I’m fine.”

“You sure?” Because Stiles wasn’t sure. Derek’s face, without all the accessories of his Santa suit, seemed - for lack of a better word- tired. There weren’t any dark circles to prove his point, or roughed up hair. The only thing Stiles had to back up his theory was his tendency for details and the confirmed fact of Derek’s bad mood.

When Derek didn’t answer, waiting patiently for Stiles to get the message, a pang of disappointment poked his chest. He’d like to know the reason that had put sadness onto Derek’s face. He’d like to discuss it with him and learn more about him. Well, yeah. Whatever.

He nodded. “Okay then. See you tomorrow.” He waved awkwardly and turned around but before he could reach the elevator, Derek’s voice stopped him.

“Stiles.”

“Yeah?” he span around only for Derek to open the door wider.

“Come in.”

He didn’t wait to be told twice. He got inside the apartment, which was a big loft. A big empty loft. A big loft, empty apart from a bed and a well used sofa.

“You live in here?”

Derek grunted and gave him a look that was something along the lines of don’t-make-me-regret-this. Okay.

“Coffee? Water?”

“Uhm… water?”

“Sit.” He ordered before he disappeared behind the door that had to lead to a kitchen. Stiles walked to the old sofa - the poor thing- the feeling inside his guts that something wasn’t right more profound. Sometimes he thought of himself like Spiderman with his spider senses, because his sharp instinct had saved him more than once. Although, this situation was slightly different.

“So. Why am I here?” he asked Derek when he came back with two glasses of water in hand, sitting at the other end of the sofa.

“You asked to come in, didn’t you?”

“Is that how you want to play it, big guy? Because I can play this game. In fact, I’m a pro in this game. Are you ready for —”

“I’m a cop, too.”

“Come again.”

“I said. I’m a cop, too.” Cop. Too. Oh.

Oh.

“Close your mouth Stiles.”

Okay. Water, please?

He took the glass in his hands and gulped down all the water in it, his eyes focusing on the ceiling, which was… high. When he finished he exhaled satisfied, his mind ready to process the new information.

“What kind of cop?”

“DEA.”

“And what are you doing in our Mall?”

“I work undercover.”

“And the only cover you thought of was a Santa suit? Really?”

“ It was the only way to stay close to my…”

“Yeah, I get it.” The fact that he was telling him about being undercover was huge on its own, Stiles didn’t want to pressure him on classified information. “And… umm… you’re telling me this because I’m also a cop? Do you need help?”

“Some, yes. It’s been taking too long.”

Stiles nodded and then it hit him. “So that explains the way you disarmed him. Fuck man, I thought you were crazy.”

“You’re calling me crazy? You ran off to the store the moment you saw the gun, Stiles.”

“I’m trained!”

“Yes, but no one knew! I didn’t know! How do you think it looked like to the rest of us when you left like this? And frankly, attacking him from behind was a shitty move even for a trained person.” Derek got closer in the heat of the moment.

“Wow! That’s the most you’ve talked in a breath in the past two weeks. Who knew you’d be able to form such complicated sentences, when the only thing you did was brooding and scaring children of!” Stiles slapped mockingly Derek’s thigh a couple of times. Derek grabbed his hand and took it off his leg, raising his eyebrows and daring Stiles to go on.

“What Derek? Like being sarcastic to an armed man with a Santa suit wasn’t a shitty move? What if he had shot you?” Reliving that very moment, when the gun turned to Derek, was physically painful. What if the gun had been real?

“The gun was fake, Stiles. I had a good look at it when I was talking to him.”

“What if you were wrong?”

“I wasn’t wrong.”

“Gee, you’re so full of yourself.”

“Or maybe I know what I’m doing.”

Stiles scoffed, trying pull his hand away from Derek’s for the first time. “Yeah right, as if you—hmphh”

It didn’t take more than a second for Stiles to realize that Derek was kissing him. Full kiss, with tongue and all. All all.

Like a hand cupping Stiles’ head, and another hand wrapping around his waist to pull him close, and a torso slamming against his, and of course a sweet, soft moan that Stiles was pretty sure he wasn’t the source of.

He kissed Derek back with two weeks of pent up sexual frustration. His own hands reached for Derek’s Henley because he’d be damned if he didn’t get to touch this body now that he had the chance. Derek complied, and after getting out of his, he helped Stiles get rid of his own.

Taking of their pants off was a task because Stiles didn’t want to part with Derek more than a couple of moments and Derek seemed to never get enough of kissing him. It was a task but they were both grown men and they managed. That Stiles ended up with his pants and underwear around his left ankle and Derek’s didn’t even reach his knees was a minor detail.

What mattered was the incredible warm sensation of Derek’s body covering his own. The fact that Derek was as aroused as Stiles was when he lowered himself on top of him, and undulated sensually, cock hard against his own. Their kisses became more fervent, needier, wetter, in sync with their thrusts.

Stiles moaned on Derek’s lips, and he allowed himself to touch Derek’s strong back, urging him to move at the same time. Damn, he was close, and Derek’s small gasp as he bit Stiles’ collarbone didn’t help him maintain his control.

“Fuck, Derek…” he wanted to warn him. Tell him to maybe slow down a little, that he wanted this to last. But he only managed these two words and a deep moan as Derek took them both in his hands and licked his lips.

“Later… we’ll have more time later.”

The words sounded ripped from him, his voice hoarse and fucking sexy. Stiles stretched his neck to kiss him and let his body find pleasure under Derek’s firm strokes. He came on his chest, body trembling hard and mind so unfocused that he almost missed Derek’s orgasm. Almost, because he didn’t. And Derek’s face as he came was a masterpiece and a legit reason for Stiles’ hard on to never die, ever again.

They collapsed in a bundle of limbs and skin, breaths heavy and heartbeats slowly calming down.

“That was… surprising.”

Derek didn’t say anything as he lay on top of him, his face lost somewhere on the crook of his neck.

“Derek, you with me buddy?”

“Yes.”

“Any second thoughts? Regrets?”

“No.”

“Okay. Uhm… How long have you been thinking about—?”

“The first day.”

“Oh.”

Derek’s breath was officially tickling him and Stiles shuddered. He took Derek’s unwillingness to retract himself from him as an invitation to caress his hair and maybe insinuate a second round. Without pants and, preferably, on the bed.

“So… you said something about later and more time?”

* * *

“Next! Oh, hello Anna! And Anna’s mother.” Stiles smile spread wide on his face, desperate to hide his fear of an imminent lawsuit.

“Anna wanted to see her grumpy Santa again.” The lady didn’t look so pleased, but she seemed to be patiently anticipating the upcoming meeting.

Nodding, Stiles pulled the rope and let Anna walk on the carpet and cover the distance to Derek. She was holding a plushy.

Derek leaned and pulled her on his lap, his eyes bright with the smile that was currently covered by his beard.

“Hello, Anna.”

“Hello, grumpy Santa.”

Derek laughed. “Do you want to tell me again what your wish is?”

The gentleness in his voice made Stiles’ legs buckle. This gentleness had been addressed to him many times in the past week that they had been together and sleeping together and having lots of hot sex together. But hands off, the best part was waking up together.

“No. I wanted you to give you this.” She handed him the plushy and Derek rolled it around in his free hand. “It’s a wolfy. Mommy says that wolves are strong and caring and they protect. So you take it because you seemed sad last time.”

“Thank you Anna. Since you were so kind to bring me a gift, it’s my turn now, isn’t it?”

“Totally!”


End file.
